It’s Gedding Bedder All thuh Time

All of my classes at university were in English. Though I had an Indian professor who was sometimes difficult to understand. English is the official language of California. Xenophobes say that most people in California speak Spanish but it is really something like 25%. English is the de facto language of the US. They have no official language though xenophobes will tell you that it is English. They also claim again that most people speak Spanish but it is closer to 10%. I am not sure what they have against the “Mexicans”. Anybody from anywhere south of the US is Mexican apparently.

I Went to California But I Forgot to Blog About It

Another great thing about school reunions is how reality just klaps you in the face. When we were young we were all going to be the great movers and shakers of our generation. Every single one of us was going to do what we loved and excel at it. Ten years on most of us were nowhere we thought we would be. There were no household name directors, movie stars or celebrities at this reunion. None of us are president of any country or major corporation. Nobody won any medals for curing diseases or invented the next big thing. Most of us are just regular people living regular lives. Some have died and some are probably homeless or junkies living in seedy motel rooms but they did not come to the reunion. Most of the people who showed up seemed to be relatively satisfied with their lives.


Downtown Los Angeles from Griffith Observatory
That is not a problem with the lens. That is the smog.


The Hollywood sign from Griffith Observatory
Most large cities have a large tower with great views. Los Angeles has Griffith Observatory.


Capitol Records
This is where old men in suits butchered Beatles albums. I don’t think the Beatles ever set foot in the building but their Walk of Fame stars are here.


Sunset Blvd
The street changes dramatically from Los Angeles to Beverly Hills.


Powell Library
With comfortable chairs and 8 million books you could easily spend a lot of time here.


Royce Hall
The steps may not look like much but on a hot summer day they can give you a good workout.


Queen Mary
Now a hotel and museum. I’ve no idea why there is a Russian submarine next to it.

All the Leaves Are Brown

When we were in school we were young and idealistic. We wanted to save the world. Or at least change it. None of us saved the world as far as I know. I’m not sure if anybody changed it. Everybody was going to be the next Spielberg. Nobody in my graduating class is anybody you have ever heard of. A few are working in the entertainment industry but they are not famous. I went to school at the same time as a few people who are now marginally known but they probably do not have Tom Cruise on their speed dial.

Ants in My Pants

I never had any kind of curtains on my windows in China. My bedroom and laundry room faced a field. The other side of the house faced another house but my kitchen was at roof level with the house across the street. Without curtains the light from my windows attracted all manner of flying insects at night. The flying insects attracted geckos. I grew up with geckos, especially in Durban, so they do not bother me.

A Brief Comparative Analysis of World Health Care Systems From My Purely Subjective and Limited Perspective

Tel Aviv

Cape Town

Shanghai

Zürich

Los Angeles

My introduction to America’s controversial health cover system came at university. Health insurance was compulsory for students. I had to pay the usual school and housing fees plus health insurance, a special fee for foreigners and taxes on top of all that. Everything was taxed. I think they even taxed my student visa. California’s tax system is second only in labyrinthe complexity to China’s. I spent more than US $14 000 on insurance in California, more than everywhere else combined. And I never really used it.


Anchorage

Natural Disasters

Israel is prone to earthquakes but there has not been a noteworthy one since before my grandmother’s grandmother was born. People still mention that it completely destroyed the Jewish side of town while the Muslim side had only minor damage. Further proof that we are the Chosen People, I suppose.

We can’t have typhoons. Tsunamis are unlikely. Parts of the country are prone to sandstorms, but not where I live. This might be the safest place I have ever lived. Discounting rocket attacks.

The Dating Game: Horror Stories II

I had thought Jerry was going to make dinner but it turned out his mother did. When we all sat down at the dinning room table she asked me if I liked pork chops. I told her I was Jewish and the look on her face was exactly how people look when told they only have six months to live. I assume. Jerry’s father mentioned that I don’t look Jewish and his mother hushed him. Literally. This is a common remark amongst Americans, as if all Jewish people have some look about them. I know where it comes from but I try to give people the benefit of the doubt and assume they do not.

Having a Jew in their house really killed the mood and the beginning of dinner was pretty quiet. Timmy or Tommy or whatever his name was asked me if I knew that it was the Jews who killed Jesus and his mother quickly escorted him out of the room for a quick talk. The father reassuringly announced that Jesus was Jewish and I mentioned that Sigmund Freud was as well. I wonder what Freud would say about that.

Where Do I Stand Politically?

That’s a good question. The answer depends whose definitions you use.

In South Afrika I was considered radically liberal by the whites because I vehemently opposed apartheid.

In America I couldn’t be liberal because I oppose abortion but I couldn’t be conservative because I oppose capital punishment.

In China I was ultra-conservative because I’m not all that keen on communism. Some of it sounds good on paper but there’s never been a communist country that wasn’t a dictatorship.

In Israel I’m considered liberal because of my views on Palestine. The fact that I call it Palestine tells you something.

Does that answer your question?

Why I’m Not a Nudist

[April 2013 note: This was always one of the most popular posts. I almost feel bad about deleting it. I suppose people who want to read it could always buy the book. No pre$$ure.]


A quiet, undisclosed location